You are not a sidekick.


Everyone has been there or knows someone who’s been there,
in the relationship
with the guy
who is great, except, well…
‘He’s just got so much potential!
If I hang in there, it will be great.
He will be thankful for my loyalty,
and we’ll live happily ever after?’

Helping someone with their demons,
can create a beautiful, maybe even everlasting bond.
That is without doubt, fucking phenomenal.
But most of the time, that’s not exactly how the story goes.

I’ve done this thing.
I’ve been that girl.
Oblivious to my own inevitable failure.
Or just too damn stubborn to acknowledge it.
No, my charm will not fix that guy.
His love for me will not motivate him to overcome his flaws.
Desperation won’t sting forever.
That ultimatum will help for a moment, maybe,
but he won’t choose you over the bottle for long.
That’s for him to do on his own accord.
Calm down that ego of yours, girl.
But more importantly, get out,
live your own life!

You are supporting and nurturing,
but you are not a sidekick,
nor a kickstand,
not a crutch,
or a safety net,
and definitely not a fucking backup plan.

You are not hear to fix him or anyone.
That would be a tragic waste of your potential.

“There is only one corner of the universe you can be certain of improving,
and that’s your own self.”
― Aldous Huxley

Open the door to men who stand on their own two feet,
they make better dance partners anyway, Xo

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